Overcoming Shyness and Social Phobia: A Step-by-Step Guide

5 Responses to “Overcoming Shyness and Social Phobia: A Step-by-Step Guide”

1. Anonymous says:

   April 25, 2010 at 6:14 pm

   Rapee’s book is short, clear,and simple, but it’s a profound contribution to understanding and psychological treatment of social anxiety that focuses on every key aspect of treatment of this widespread, undertreated disorder. In a seamless, organized fashion, the author introduces perspectives and techniques that a social phobic can easily learn and practice.

   This work represents a foundation which will power up and significantly strengthen the potential of self-help for shyness and social anxiety. It is firmly grounded in cutting edge clinical research and was published concurrent with a scholarly volume on which it is based.

   Rapee’s book may be used in or out of therapy. If the reader has a therapist who doesn’t know how to relieve his social phobia, both client and therapist should get this book.
   Rating: 5 / 5
2. Anonymous says:

   April 25, 2010 at 6:48 pm

   I am undergoing therapy for social anxiety. My doctor assigned this book.

   While it does contain several useful insights and practical techniques, I found its writing style patronizing. Not that the author writes in a condescending way; rather, the vocabulary and examples appear to be aimed at someone with a junior high school education.

   The fictional case studies are populated with simplistic patients, whose problems are resolved using very straightforward approaches. Too straightforward for my taste.

   In discussing a traumatic social event, a fictional patient tells his doctor that he is afraid to go to bars with his coworkers because his hands will shake when he attempts to drink from his glass. The doctor asks him to recall previous similar situations, and whether his hands shook on those occasions. The patient concedes that sometimes they shook, sometimes they didn’t.

   Then the doctor points out that his fear of drinking in public places is based on a faulty premise (that his hands always shake in those situations). When the patient suddenly realizes that his hands don’t ALWAYS shake, he’s suddenly halfway cured.

   So the examples were oversimplified. I can understand that. More bothersome was the occasional illogical leap employed to bolster fairly obvious observations.

   At one point, the author tells us that if someone inexplicably breaks into laughter in our presence, we should not assume that they are laughing at us. Which is fine and good.

   But he goes on to reassure us using statistics: Assume that there are a thousand of possible reasons that someone could start laughing. Therefore, the odds that we’re the source of amusement is only one in a thousand.

   Um, no. Just because there are n possible explanations, that doesn’t mean that the odds of any particular one being true is 1/n. Sloppy explanations like this just erode the credibility.

   Add to this the author’s complete avoidance of clinical terminology (he spent a page talking about desensitization without ever once using the term), and what you have is a book intended to be read by troubled pre-teens.

   Now having declared this book unfit for human consumption, it does deserve some praise. It contains some practical techniques to help you sort out your specific anxiety triggers and ameliorate them. And there are some genuine insights as well.

   I simply could not abide the writing style and the occasional deficiency of logic. If there were a Psychology/Self-Help shelf in the Juveniles section of your library, that’s where this book would belong.
   Rating: 2 / 5
3. Anonymous says:

   April 25, 2010 at 9:32 pm

   I’ve never left a review for a book, but after reading this really helpful book I am in debt with Mr. Rapee. This is an easy to read book, short (116 p), that goes straight to the point. I’ve read 5 books on social anxiety and I can say that this is the most practical one, with tips that you can start applying immediately. There are cognitive suggestions to overcome your fears, issues about exposure (what he calls reality testing), and tips about improving your social skills. But remember that this book alone won’t cure you: In my case, medication, group therapy, and aerobic exercise (yoga too) are other weapons I’m using to fight sad and anxiety. Good luck.
   Rating: 5 / 5
4. T-Mogul says:

   April 25, 2010 at 10:32 pm

   My therapist assigned this book when I sought treatment for SA/SP. It was exactly what I needed to get me off the couch and back out into society. Rapee’s book offers a plan that’s simple and easy to follow, regardless of your educational background. Other reviewers chide the writing as ‘low brow’ and ‘junior high grade level’, but they have to remember that SA/SP isn’t limited to College Graduates. This book is MUST whether your in therapy or simply looking for a self-help option for SA/SP.
   Rating: 5 / 5
5. Hans says:

   April 26, 2010 at 12:51 am

   If you want basic cognitive techniques, this is a good little book. But these ways of thinking are difficult to have a big effect unless you complement it with cognitive group therapy for this disorder. My major problem with the book is it’s total lack of information conserning the subconscious, since the automatic fear responses arise from that part of us. In my view, results will be better when the person combines cognitive self-help/group therapy with fitting visualization techniques. Willpower is always important, but mental imagery training helps the irrational aspects to be more easily tackled by the rational mind. A lot of intelligent people having this disorder is proof that it can be difficult to just “think it away”. The negative programming behind sosial anxiety lies deep in the psyche. But it’s not what’s going on outside the person that’s a problem, it’s the filter called perception, the way the person thinks about what’s going on outside him, that’s causing the fear. Reality and real life is mostly what happens inside of all of us. Social anxiety is a type of filter giving the person overlearned/irrational responses, like it’s a push of a button. The person is not the disorder. The person is not this filter. It needs to be reprogrammed. This can be done. Rapee’s book gives you part of the recipe. Personally I would recommend “Psycho-Cybernetics” by Maxwell Maltz, “The Power of Your Subconscious Mind: One of the Most Powerful Self-Help Guides Ever Written” by Joseph Murphy, and “Change Your Life in Seven Days” by Paul McKenna (currently available at Amazon.co.uk). These books give a broader understanding of how the mind works and how it can be changed.
   Rating: 4 / 5